*****
It was midday when the messenger arrived, and the weather couldn't have been nicer: blue skies, trees full with green leaves, a playful- and, Gabrielle would swear, mischievious- breeze that tended to alternately lift her skirt and blow her scarves away at the most inopportune moments, only to cool her temper with a perfectly lovely and well-behaved gust the very next second.
So Xena wasn't surprised when the messenger arrived and asked if she were the Warrior Princess. "I told you," she said to Gabrielle after she'd given affirmation, "these days never last." She brusquely handed the messenger a dinar in exchange for the scroll he was delivering. He looked at the coin for a moment as if expecting it to multiply in his hand, then gave a much louder sigh than was needed and rode off.
Gabrielle watched as Xena unrolled the scroll, and her eyes went wide. "What?" asked the bard, from the rock where she was seated writing on her own parchment. Xena didn't answer, nor did she even bother to tear her eyes away from the message she was looking at.
As Gabrielle watched, the warrior raised an eyebrow and peered at the scroll even more intently. "Xena, what is it?" Gabrielle asked, growing frustrated. "The Horde? Najara again? Is it something about your mother?" She was getting fully exasperated, as Xena had gone into her 'impossible-to-read' mode and was very competently ignoring everything around her. Gabrielle snorted. "Fine. I don't really care, anyway," she said, hoping to at least give Xena a taste of her own behaviour. She went back to her latest scroll, fully attempting to convince herself that, indeed, she didn't care.
That lasted for about five seconds, because when Xena said "Joxer's getting married," in a rather astonished tone, Gabrielle stood up so quickly that her scroll and quill slid right off of her lap.
She was at Xena's side in a second, clamoring closely to get a look at the message. Surely Xena was just joking, right? Joxer couldn't get married! But sure enough, the invitation to the wedding of Joxer the Mighty and some woman named Jessa stared back at her defiantly.
No date was given, but it was to take place in Corinth at Joxer's family's home. Of course, the illustrations were what really made the deal. The picture of Joxer was one of the best she'd ever seen: somehow it was quite dashing and yet, it still looked exactly like Joxer. The woman was unfamiliar, but somehow amazingly perfect. Probably more artistic license, of course, but still striking.
Stunned, Gabrielle turned to Xena. "Pinch me," she said. Xena shrugged and obliged, and Gabrielle yelped.
"Better?" Xena asked wryly.
Rubbing her midriff where Xena had tweaked her, Gabrielle pouted. "No. This doesn't make any more sense than before, and now my stomach's going to be bruised, to boot."
*****
They weren't far outside of Corinth, fortunately- only about a day and half's trek. Within a very short time of their receipt of the wedding invitation, the playful breeze evidently got tired of such an easy target and went off to find something else to do, while the blue sky started to take on slightly grayer tones.
Argo took note of the coming storm before anyone else, and it was the twitching of her ears and shaking of her head that brought it to Xena's attention. She put a hand to Argo's neck to calm the mare, and said, "There's a storm coming. We'll camp down for the night in the first secure-looking cave we find."
"Right," said Gabrielle distantly. "Joxer wouldn't get married without us there, right?"
Xena shrugged. "Probably not. Then again, why should he wait for us? It's not like we wait for him before we do anything important."
"Yeah, but we're his best friends," Gabrielle objected. "And it's different for us. We do more important things, right? ...Right?" Xena didn't answer, just shook her head a little and walked ahead of Gabrielle. The blonde rolled her eyes; there was nothing more irritating than when Xena didn't answer her questions, even if she was going to disagree. She rethought her stance on the subject. "Okay... so maybe that's a little one-sided of me. But what I really meant was that Joxer always seems to wait for us when he has something important, or he seeks us out or something. And besides, I did invite him to my wedding."
"Of course. And I'm sure he'll wait for us. That's probably why the invitation gave no set date; he wants to get married as soon as possible, but still give us time to get there."
Gabrielle nodded; that made sense. They walked in relative silence as Xena scouted for a proper cave, before Gabrielle blurted, "And what kind of a name is Jessa anyway?!"
Xena gave her an odd look.
*****
The storm was a big one. Their fire had to be sufficiently far from the entrance to the cave in order for it to survive, and as a result the spot in which they were camped was a bit on the dank and damp side already. Gabrielle didn't dare move from her pelt for fear of putting a limb into something awful, as Xena, standing by the cave's entrance, brushed Argo down to relax her.
Xena returned to find Gabrielle looking over the invitation scroll again by the light of the fire. "Does it say anything new?" she teased as she settled onto her own pelt.
"Very funny," Gabrielle deadpanned, shooting Xena a look over the top of the parchment. "I was just looking at this picture of that Jessa woman. It's not a very good rendering in this light, is it?" She passed it to Xena.
The dark-haired warrior cocked an eyebrow as she glanced at it. "Looks the same to me."
Gabrielle sighed in exasperation. "Xena, her eyes are practically crossed! And I think she has a double-chin." She pulled the scroll in for a really good close look.
"If you don't mind my asking," Xena began as she stretched out on her fur pelt, "just what is it about Joxer's fiancee that you dislike so much?"
"Well... She's marrying Joxer. I mean, come on, Xena! How great can she be?"
Xena raised both eyebrows at this, and Gabrielle shifted uncomfortably. "Joxer has his ways of attracting nice women. As I recall, Lila seemed quite fond of Joxer last time we saw her."
This didn't seem to please Gabrielle. "She'd have grown out of that! She's just a kid!" she said indignantly, but then softened a bit. "It's not that I don't like the big lug... But he's so, so... childish! I guess I just think of him as a boy, still- sort of the way Perdicus was before he fought in the army. Only..."
"Only...?" Xena echoed, a smile beginning to form on her lips.
Gabrielle looked up, smiling herself. "Only Perdicus didn't fall over things so much." She and Xena shared a brief laugh. "What kind of woman would Joxer really attract, anyway? What kind of woman would be able to put up with him tripping all the time, and always saying the wrong thing, and... Oh, you know the way he is, Xena!"
From the look on Xena's face, she knew exactly how Joxer was. She hesitated. "You're the bard. Is there a polite synonym for 'dork'?"
"The first thing that comes to mind is 'Joxer'."
They laughed again. Xena continued. "But he tries so hard. I have to confess, he's grown on me."
Gabrielle smiled softly. "Yeah. Me, too."
Xena didn't speak for a while. Gabrielle prompted her, and the warrior started. "Sorry. I was just thinking about how weird it's going to be, not having him pop up all the time and follow us around, trying to impress us."
The thought, Gabrielle found, was a sad one. "Yeah. I guess Mrs. Joxer probably won't want him spending long stretches of time with two beautiful women," she quipped.
"Unless she decides to come along with him," Xena shot back.
"Gods! Don't even suggest such a thing!!" Gabrielle said, surprising even herself with the sincerity behind the attempted joke.
It struck Xena, too. "You haven't even met her, Gabrielle. It's not very karmic to judge a stranger."
"I know, I know," Gabrielle said. "I don't know what it is, Xena, but I don't like her. I'll think of a reason later." She grinned, and Xena returned it as she settled back down on her pelt. The bard sighed, pensively. "Joxer needs someone to take care of him, really. He needs someone more level-headed than he is, who can keep him out of trouble. That's why he and Meg could never really last together, if you ask me."
"I didn't," Xena mumbled. Gabrielle chose to ignore that.
"Really, though! Joxer and Meg would never have worked. Joxer needs someone more mature, thoughtful... refined." Gabrielle smoothed her skirt as she spoke. "Maybe not a warrior, but someone who could think her way out of a problem..."
"Someone like you, in other words." Xena was smirking at her.
Blushing, Gabrielle stuttered through a denial. "N-not necessarily like me! I mean, maybe with one or two of my... uh... well, maybe a little like me, but she could also be like you ... or something."
"I don't want to marry Joxer," Xena replied, now fully teasing her flustered friend.
"Neither do I!" Gabrielle stated hotly.
Xena chuckled. "Well, you sure seem jealous enough."
The bard's mouth opened in an 'o' of indignation. "I am not jealous!!" Xena let her silence speak for itself. After a few long moments of it, Gabrielle caved. "Okay. So I am... a little bit... jealous. I mean, really, I couldn't be happier on my own... But I've got the slightest of a jealous bone, to tell the truth."
"I hadn't noticed," Xena deadpanned.
Gabrielle raised her hands defensively. "And it's not that I love Joxer or anything, but the idea of him with this... thin-faced, girly little Miss Perfect," she indicated the invitation scroll again, "tends to enlarge it. After all, he was my friend before anyone else's... including yours."
Xena snorted at this. "Up until a while ago you would barely acknowledge aloud that Joxer was your friend."
"Maybe so, but he and I had a heart to heart long before you even met him." Gabrielle crossed her arms.
Sighing, Xena raised her hands to signal that she was giving up. "Okay, you call it whatever you want. I'm going to get some shuteye, and the rain should let up long enough for us to make it the rest of the way to Corinth tomorrow." She rolled over on the pelt, then rolled back to face Gabrielle. "Oh, and you really should do something to take your mind off of this," she advised. "Obsessing really doesn't do anyone any good."
"I'm not-" Gabrielle began angrily, as Xena rolled over again, chuckling to herself. The blonde bard broke off in mid-sentence, but stuck her tongue out at Xena's back.
A few moments later, after Gabrielle had supposed that Xena was probably asleep, the warrior spoke again. "You know, Gabrielle, without even meeting this woman I'm willing to bet that she has quite a bit in common with you." She waited for a beat, then said, "Goodnight."
Gabrielle didn't answer, but she did dwell on the subject for a little while. How would Xena know something like that? Well, she was probably just dwelling on the potential good that this Jessa woman might have. Although dwelling on potential good was usually Gabrielle's department, and Xena herself was known to not particularly care.
Despite that, Gabrielle couldn't shake the feeling that Joxer just shouldn't be marrying this woman. It wasn't necessarily jealousy, even if Xena thought it was. Maybe she was having one of her prophecy moments, or... Oh, to Hades with it. So she was jealous. So what? It was just beginning to occur to her how much she would miss not having him around, and how much she'd taken him for granted.
And, well, maybe she could have been the woman to take care of him, in time. If he'd grown up a bit more... if she'd been willing to wait for him to grow up. Funny, the things you learn to take for granted... Perdicus should have shown her how people can change in time, and there had always been something to Joxer that...
Oh, well. It was moot now. Her heart felt quite heavy as she realized that she didn't even have a claim on him to assert at the wedding. She may as well just give him her blessing, and try to like this Jessa woman as much as she could.
But I don't, she thought spitefully, clinging to her distate. I really hate her. By no accounts did she want to admit to anyone- even
Xena- the actual reason why, though... I'll think of a reason later. For now, she decided she'd better take Xena's advice and get her mind off of the whole thing.
In the dwindling light of the fire, she pulled out her quill and her most recent scroll. The wedding invitation sat near her, tauntingly, and she shoved it away with her toe. Somehow the little scribble of that Jessa woman still caught her eye, and refused to let go. Gabrielle glared at it for a while, then her gaze drifted to her quill.
*****
Xena prodded her awake the next morning. "Come on. It's dry out now, and we'd better get going."
Bleary-eyed, Gabrielle sat up and squinted at her friend. "I can't. It's too early."
"It's nearly midday. Honestly, Gabrielle, you have to stop getting so wrapped up in your writing at night. We have to get to Joxer's wedding." She stepped about the cave carefully, gathering up their belongings to load onto Argo. Then she stopped. "Where's the invitation?"
That sounded familiar to Gabrielle. She thought on it for a moment, her eyes still mostly closed, before she remembered with a start. Suddenly she was much more awake. "Oh, wait-"
"Never mind," Xena said, "I found it." She picked it up, then looked at it closely. Biting the inside of her cheek, she turned a half-serious look on Gabrielle. "Your handiwork, I suppose?"
Blushing, Gabrielle gave her friend a weak smile as she looked over what she'd done the night before. Jessa's smiling face was now adorned with horns, and a tooth had been totally blacked out. "I couldn't fall asleep," she said lamely. Xena blinked several times, biting her lips. "It was only one tooth!" Gabrielle protested.
Finally Xena handed the scroll back to Gabrielle, and patted her friend on the back, still looking to be on the verge of laughter. "It's your quill," she said, and walked out to load up Argo. "But Gabrielle..." she shot over her shoulder, "you do realize we have to show them the invitation to get into the wedding?"
Gabrielle became noticeably paler.
*****
Joxer had never looked happier. Even Gabrielle couldn't deny it; when he came to greet them, he was nearly glowing. His outfit was casual- no more creaky armour or awkward helmet. Another thing Gabrielle found herself missing... The old Joxer seemed to be diseappearing already.
But when he gathered them into a group hug, she couldn't help but smile and congratulate him. Pulling back, she looked at him closely, hoping he wouldn't see the sadness she felt filled with.
He noticed anyway, of course. "Gabby? What's wrong?"
She shook her head. "Oh, Joxer, don't think I'm not happy for you... But I'm going to miss you so much!" She was surprised to find her eyes filling with tears. "We both will, won't we, Xena?"
Xena, one arm around each of her friends' shoulders, smiled warmly. "You better believe it," she said, her voice filled with emotion.
Joxer positively beamed, although there were tears in his eyes as well, and when he spoke his throat was tight. "I'll miss you guys too," he managed, then had to pause. "But you know you're welcome any... Any time." Then he surprised them each by giving them both a kiss on the cheek. "C'mon, you have to meet Jessa! She's great! I think you'll really like her, Gabby!"
Gabrielle had to force a smile. "I'm sure she's wonderful," she said without enthusiasm. Xena gave her a look. Joxer, fortunately, missed her tone.
"Yeah, she's a lot like you, actually!" At that, Xena looked smug. "Her hair's a lot like yours was before you cut it, I think. And last winter Solstice she spent the whole time cooking a feast for orphans! Oh, and she tells stories too, only not for a living like you... she's really a healer. And she dances just great! And boy, is she smart..."
Gabrielle sighed. As she'd expected, none of this changed her opinion of this Jessa woman, and she was now running low on excuses to hate her. Oh well... She'd think of a reason later. For now, there was a wedding to attend.
*****
© 1999 by Xebbie
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